


Jay's Dick

by GraySonOfGotham



Series: Tentatodd Week 2019 [6]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Blow Jobs, Come Swallowing, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Jason is literally a tiny tentacle, Jason speaks in third person, M/M, Magic, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Snowballing, Soulmates, Spell Failure, Telepathic Bond, Telepathy, Tentacle Sex, Tentatodd Week 2019 Day 7, blame the magicians, this one does have pancakes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-18 14:34:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17582684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GraySonOfGotham/pseuds/GraySonOfGotham
Summary: Jason was on an off-planet mission when he was hit by a stray spell that turned him into a tiny, angry three-inch worm-like tentacle.If that was not insult enough, Dick is the only person he can communicate with. And he finds Jason's squeaky, high-pitched, only-works-in-third-person voice rather adorable.Tentatodd Week 2019, Day 7 - Crack/Humor





	Jay's Dick

_“Dickie! Dickie! Dickie, wake up~ Jay wants food!”_

Dick groaned and rolled over. “Go back to sleep, Jay.”

_“No! Jay wants food! Dickie, don’t ignore Jay!”_

“’m not ignoring you,” Dick grumbled, yawning. He cracked an eye open to the little tentacle hovering right in front of his face. It was bright red in anger or annoyance. “Just want sleep. I went on patrol, and I’m tired and bruised.”

 _“Dickie is fine! Jay is hungry.”_ The tiny tentacle’s voice squeaked in his mind. The tentacle inched forward a bit and tapped Dick’s nose. “ _Get up, Dickie. Up, up, up!”_

Dick just laughed and reached up and plucked the little tentacle that used to be his brother Jason off of his face. He held Jason but the end of his tiny little body and watched as Jason writhed around in anger.

“ _Put Jay down! Jay is mad!”_

Dick finally let Jason drop onto his covers. It took Jason a few seconds to crawl back up to Dick’s face.

 _“Dickie is mean_.”

“Aw, I’m just teasing, Jay,” Dick said, gently stroking the little tentacle’s head.

A few days ago, while on an interdimensional mission, Jason got hit with a stray spell that turned him into a tiny worm-like creature. He was about the length of Dick’s palm, had no visible eyes, mouth, or any distinguishable features.

He just looked like a fat, floppy leech, which was what Dick actually thought he was when Tim set the jar in front of him three days ago.

He had been about to dissect the wriggling alien leech when he heard the voice in his head. It was a high-pitched, shrill voice that shouted profanities and threats at ‘Dickie’. Tim thought Dick was crazy to be talking to the little tentacle ( _“Jay is not a leech! Jay is a tentacle!”)_  that was what was left of their brother. Tim had tried over and over to communicate with Jason, but got nothing apart from Jason throwing himself at the glass jar in frustration.

Dick found it quite funny though, seeing that Jason’s vocabulary was rather limited in his new form, and he could only talk in third person.

Zatanna had assured that Jason would return to his normal form in a few weeks, and since no one knows what spell hit him, there was no other choice but to wait it out.

And since Dick was the only one who could actually talk to Jason, Dick brought the little creature back to his apartment in Blüdhaven.

 _“Don’t tease Jay_ ,” Jason said grumpily. He nudged Dick’s chin.  _“Up, up, Dickie.”_

“Okay, okay, I’m getting up,” Dick groaned. He flung the blankets back, knocking Jason under the blankets with a squeak. Dick stood up and stretched, laughing at the shrill complaints voiced by Jason.

_“Dickie is mean! Jay will hurt Dickie! Get Jay now!”_

“You’re such a little crybaby,” Dick said. He reached under the blankets, feeling around for the little tentacle. He felt Jason curl around his finger and he pulled his hand out. Jason was still a bright, angry red. Jason inched his way up Dick’s bare arm, onto his shoulder, and then to Dick’s neck.

Then, there was a loud sucking pop noise.

 _“Dickie is mean_ ,” Jason grumbled again. Then, he relaxed on Dick’s shoulder.

Dick rolled his eyes and went to the bathroom. He glanced in the mirror, where he saw Jason lying complacently on his shoulder. On his neck was a penny-sized mark. There were several other of those marks on Dick’s neck, and a few on his chest.

It was Jason’s only way of “hurting Dickie” in his tiny form. Thing is, it did not hurt Dick. It just left a mark for a couple days, not too different from a hickie. Dick found it kind of adorable.

“I’m going to take a shower,” Dick said. “You wanna soak in your own bath?”

_“No. Jay will go with Dickie.”_

“Okay, suit yourself. But if you fall down the drain again, I’m not going to shut off the water to fish you out.”

_“Jay will hurt Dickie again.”_

“Oh please, you just want to mark me. Possessive little shit.”

_“Jay’s Dickie.”_

“Yeah, yeah,” Dick said. He pushed his underwear down and turned on the water, waiting for it to get hot.

Jason got up and made his way down Dick’s chest, somehow managing to defy gravity. He dropped down, landing on Dick’s morning wood.

 _“Dickie is hard,”_ Jason mused.  _“Want Jay to take care of it?”_

“Last time you tried to ‘take care of it’, you nearly gave me a heart attack.”

_“Dickie still came though.”_

“Okay, that was only because it was kind of hot after I got over the whole scare of you swallowing my cock.”

_“Feels good though?”_

“Yeah, but give a man a warning next time.”

 _“Jay is going to swallow Dickie’s cock now,”_ Jason said helpfully. Then, the tip that was his head opened up, stretching around the head of Dick’s cock, swallowing it into his tiny little body.

Dick groaned and threw his head back. “Fuck!”

Jason slowly inched his way onto Dick’s cock, stretching himself over the entirety of Dick’s cock. He was a rosy pink now – content and pleased. Jason’s body squeezed Dick’s cock like he was trying to digest him, but it felt so good.

Dick gripped the wall and gasped out. “Jay, hmm, that’s good!”

_“Dickie moan for Jay.”_

Dick easily let out a long moan, his knees buckling as Jason rippled around him. “J-Jason, fuck, I’m going to come!”

_“Not yet! Dickie hold it!”_

“Fuck, Jay,  _please_ ,” Dick babbled.

 _“Hold it, Dickie!”_ Jason commanded in his high-pitched voice. “ _Only when Jay says.”_

“Ah, shit,” Dick cursed. He bucked upwards. He squeezed his nails into his palms to try to stave off his orgasm. “Please, please, Jay, I need to come.”

 _“Why should Jay let Dickie come?”_ Jason asked, sounding amused.

“I’ll order your- your favorite foods,” Dick choked out through gritted teeth. “And we- we can watch,  _ah_ , movies all- all day, just  _please_.”

_“Will Dickie wash Jay?”_

“Yes, yes, I will!”

_“Will Dickie be nice to Jay?”_

“Mmm, yes, Jay, I promise, I promise!”

_“Okay, Dickie can come. Come for Jay.”_

Dick let out a loud shout as he came, spurting into Jason’s body hard. His knees went weak and he nearly fell from how hard he came.

When he came down from his climax, Jason slowly eased off of him.

 _“Up, Dickie_.”

Dick reached down, still panting, and lifted Jason off of his spent cock, holding the little tentacle in his hand. Jason was considerably fatter now that he was pumped full of Dick’s cum.

Jason dragged himself back up Dick’s arm, onto his shoulder, and up Dick’s neck. Then, he was hovering right in front of Dick’s mouth.

Jason’s mouth opened again, latching tightly onto Dick’s lips.  _“Open up, Dickie.”_

Dick opened his mouth and felt his own warm cum pour out of Jason and onto his own mouth. He let out a soft moan as he tasted himself – both salty and sweet.

 _“Swallow, Dickie_ ,” Jason said sternly in Dick’s head while still latched onto Dick’s lips in some weird kiss. Dick swallowed. “ _Good Dickie,”_ Jason purred. He unlatched from Dick’s lips and made his way to his perch on Dick’s shoulder.  _“Now shower. Then food.”_

~

They ate pancakes for breakfast.

Jason, who was extremely dependent on skin-on-skin contact for some reason, wrapped himself around Dick’s wrist. And whenever he wanted food, he would open his mouth, and Dick would grab a small bit of pancake, dip it in a bit of syrup, and let Jason suck it off his fingertip.

It was a long process to feed Jason, but Dick found it extremely endearing.

 _“More pancakes, Dickie. Jay wants more_.”

“You already ate an entire pancake, Jason!”

_“More! Jay wants more!”_

“So demanding,” Dick said. “Geez, I’ve never met someone more demanding than you. Were you this needy as a human?”

_“Jay could do things by himself as human. Jay didn’t need Dickie.”_

“Aw, I’m hurt. Are you saying you won’t need me a in a couple weeks’ time?” Dick joked.

_“Yes.”_

Dick paused. He stared at the little tentacle wrapped around his wrist like a thick bracelet. Jason was a dark blue right now. He was calm and collected. So he was not lying.

“Oh,” Dick said. He grabbed another small bit of pancake, dabbed a bit of syrup on it and held it out to Jason. He gave Jason a huge smile, even though he was not feeling it. “Well, I’ll always be here if you need me, Little Wing.”

Jason took the pancake and swallowed it. He got a bit of syrup on the tip that was his face. He did not immediately ask for more.  _“Dickie is unhappy about that. Why?”_

“Hm? Oh, I’m not unhappy,” Dick said, lying through his teeth. “I’m just glad at least you’re letting me help you at all,” he said. That much was true.

 _“Dickie is a liar now. Bad Dickie,_ ” Jason said. Thankfully, he did not press more.  _“Give Jay more pancakes.”_

~

 _“Is Dickie going out tonight?”_ Jason asked, peeking out from under Dick’s t-shirt.

“Maybe,” Dick said, looking into his closet. “What’s that to you?”

_“Why is Dickie going out? Jay wants to watch movies.”_

“Well, I wanna get laid tonight,” Dick said absently, pulling out a thin white shirt hugged his form. “I can put a couple movies on and you can watch them?”

_“Jay does not want to watch movies alone, Dickie. Jay wants to watch with Dickie. Cuddles.”_

Dick sighed. “But we’ve been cuddling for the past two weeks,” Dick said. “My neck is  _chafing_ from all the nuzzling you’ve done.”

_“Jay does not want Dick to get laid by a stranger.”_

“Okay, it’s been two weeks, Jason. This possessiveness is getting out of hand. The… blowjobs are great, but you can’t possibly expect me to survive another week on just your only method of getting me off, right?”

_“Yes.”_

“For fuck’s sake, Jay! I don’t exactly expect you to know everything about my life, but I need to be fucked and manhandled and held down, okay?! I’m going to go crazy if I don’t get thoroughly pounded tonight!”

Jason went silent.  _“And Dickie just wants Jay to stay home?”_

“ _Yes_ ,” Dick said. “Stay home, watch movies, raid my pantry, sleep in my shirts, I don’t  _care_. I just need some time to- to myself.”

Jason flopped off of his normal perch on Dick’s shoulder, landing on the floor.

Dick gasped and quickly bent down and scooped Jason back up. “Are you okay? Are you hurt? Jay, c’mon, say something?”

Jason twisted around to face Dick. He regarded Dick for a few seconds. His color went from neutral green to a deep, sad blue. He lay listlessly in Dick’s palm, not moving.

“Don’t ignore me,” Dick scoffed. He put Jason onto the dresser. “I’m not at fault here, okay? Don’t think you can guilt me into staying home today.”

 _“Jay isn’t trying to guilt Dickie,”_ Jason said, the usually annoyingly high-pitched voice tinged with sadness now.  _“Jay just wants Dickie to stay with Jay.”_

“I’ll be back in five hours max,” Dick huffed. “I’ve got patrol tonight anyway.”

_“Dickie will smell like someone else when he comes back.”_

“I’ll shower, and you won’t even know the difference.”

_“Jay will know the difference. Jay will feel another man on Dickie’s skin.”_

“Jason,” Dick said, lowering his voice and turning to face Jason, where he was still lying on the dresser, looking rather dead. “I’m not yours. You said it yourself. A week from now, we part and nothing’s going to change between us. You do your stuff, and I will do my stuff.  _We_  aren’t anything, Jay! While you are and always will be my Little Wing and I’ll love you until the end of time, I also need to take care of myself, okay?”

 _“We… aren’t anything?”_ Jason repeated. He curled up in himself, his already small size squishing into something even smaller.

Dick sighed in frustration. “Stop it! Stop twisting my words and trying to guilt-trip me. I didn’t mean it like  _that_. I just meant, everything that happened between us in the past two weeks and whatever’s going to happen next week isn’t going to affect whatever relationship we had before, not that we actually had one.”

Jason let out a soft squeak, still curled up in a tight ball.  _“Okay…”_ he whispered.

Dick glared at him for a second. “You know what? Fine, whatever, I don’t care.” He shucked off his current t-shirt and pulled on the white one.

He then grabbed a dark blue jean jacket and pulled it on. He stormed to the bathroom, applied some eyeliner, mascara, and just a little bit of lip gloss. He ran his hands through his hair a bit, giving himself a quick once over.

Then, he breezed back to his room, not even casting a glance at where Jason was still curled up.

Dick grabbed his keys and left.

~

Four hours later, Dick returned. He tossed his keys onto the counter and stomped to the kitchen. He grabbed a large bowl, a large spoon, and his favorite cereal. Dick dumped himself a huge pile of the sugary flakes and drowned it in milk. He carried his late night snack into his room and crawled into bed.

Dick turned on the TV and started eating his cereal.

He was halfway through his bowl (though it only took five minutes), Dick stopped and frowned.

He had been home for a total of nearly fifteen minutes already and there had not even been a peep from Jason.

Chewing slowly and looking around his dark room, Dick set the bowl aside and pushed himself out of bed.

“Jason?”

There was no answer.

Dick flicked the light on and stared at the spot where Jason had been curled up before he left. Jason was no longer there.

“Shit,” Dick cursed under his breath. “Jay! Where are you?”

Jason did not answer. Dick started panicking a little bit. Not only has Jason never ignored him before, but they have never been separated for so long.

“Jason!” Dick called again. “Fucking answer me, Little Wing!” Dick got on the floor and peered under the bed, in the closet, behind the dresser. He found no sign of his little tentacle. Dick let out a soft groan and he rested his head against the wall of his room. “Jay… please answer me. Are you still mad? I’m  _sorry_ , okay? Please…”

_“Jay isn’t mad. Just sad.”_

Dick leapt to his feet. “Jason! Where are you?”

_“Jay is hiding.”_

“From me?”

_“Yes.”_

“Why?” Dick asked, starting his search with renewed vigor. However, since Jason’s voice was in his head, Dick could not exactly locate Jason’s whereabouts by his voice.

 _“Dickie made Jay sad. Jay does not want to see Dickie.”_ There was a short pause.  _“Dickie does not want to see Jay.”_

“No, no, Jay, why wouldn’t I want to see you? I just said I needed a breather. C’mon, Jay, don’t be like this.”

_“Dickie doesn’t like Jay anymore.”_

“No, Jason, I love you. Do you hear what you’re saying?”

 _“Dickie wants Jay gone,”_ Jason’s voice said miserably.  _“So Jay will go.”_

“I  _don’t_ want you gone, Jason! I want you here. I promise. I… really want you here,” Dick sighed. “I know I may have said some things that hurt you before, but… you said some things that hurt me too. I was a little mad, a little hurt. I shouldn’t have been so petty though. I’m sorry.”

 _“Jay is sorry too,”_ Jason said quietly.  _“But Jay will still go.”_

“Don’t go, Jay. Don’t leave me again, Little Wing,” Dick said. “I didn’t… sleep with anyone tonight. I couldn’t get into the right mood because I kept thinking about how sad you sounded.”

_“Jay ruined Dickie’s night.”_

“No, you didn’t,” Dick insisted. “Please, just come out? We can cuddle all night long and watch movies, okay? I’ll even skip patrol.”

_“Bats won’t be happy.”_

“Fuck him,” Dick said. “I’m going to spend some time with my little Jay. He deserves some love and cuddles.”

_“Cuddles?”_

“Lots of cuddles, and kisses, and snacks,” Dick promised. “Only if you tell me where you are.”

There was a long pause. Then, Jason said,  _“In the shower drain.”_

Dick ran to the bathroom and stuck a finger into the drain. Immediately, he felt the familiar slimy, rubbery feel of Jason’s body curl around his finger.

Dick pulled the sad, little tentacle up and smiled in relief. “Hello, Jaybird. You miss me?”

Jason peeked out at him from under his finger. He was rubbery grey in color, and his head drooped.  _“Dickie is not mad?”_

“No,” Dick said. “I’m not mad at you. C’mon, let’s get you washed up and we’ll go raid my pantry, okay?”

_“Okay. Thank you, Dickie, for taking care of Jay. You are too good to Jay.”_

“I love you, Jason. There’s no such thing as too good for someone you love,” Dick said softly.

~

The last week sped by in a blink of an eye.

After the bump in their relationship, Dick and Jason were rarely separated. They ate together. They showered together. They did chores together. They slept together. And they  _slept_ together.

After some thinking, Dick had come to the conclusion that he could do without a rough fucking for another week. After all, in another week, he would be living alone again.

Jason would human, and he would be going off to who knows where on his own adventure. Jason would not want anything to do with Dick, if he remembered what happened in the past three weeks. Jason may not even remember at all.

So Dick was going to take advantage of what time they had left.

And even though the sex was different, it was still mind-blowing. There was something sexy about Jason’s dirty talk, even though it was in a high-pitched alien voice, even though it was in Dick’s head, even though Jason had to talk in third person the entire time.

So Dick wrung his last week of everything it could give.

Then, it was gone.

Dick woke up to an empty bed. He called Jason’s name, hoping and praying for an answer, whether it was in his head or aloud.

There was no response.

Dick checked the entire apartment. There was no sign of a human Jason anywhere, nor any sign of his little tentacle Jason.

Then, his phone rang. It was Tim.

“’Morning, Dick,” Tim said with a yawn. “Jason just got to the Manor. He doesn’t remember anything, so I filled him out on the basics. Thanks for watching over him. We’re running tests right now to see if there are any lingering effects. You okay?”

Dick sat down on the couch, hard. He stared at the TV where for the past three weeks, he and Jason would watch several movies a day. “Yeah,” he answered. “Was just wondering where he went.”

Tim laughed. “Yeah, I assumed he wouldn’t say anything to you when he left. You sound tired,” Tim yawned. “Go to sleep. I’ll give you an update later.”

Dick cracked a tiny smile. “I’m not the tired one, Timmy. But thank you. Bye.” Dick did not wait for Tim to say good-bye before he ended the call.

He lay in bed for the rest of the day, just staring up at the ceiling.

Day melted into night, and as it grew darker, Dick dragged himself up for patrol. He got dressed without enthusiasm.

Dick rubbed his wrist. He missed the warmth Jason gave off when he curled around Dick’s wrist like a bracelet when they went out on patrol together. Dick grabbed his escrimas off the floor and stood up. Immediately, he was put into a choke hold with a gun to his temple.

Dick closed his eyes. The presence was familiar. Dick relaxed.

The intruder tsked. “Getting rusty or getting reckless, Dickiebird,” Jason laughed. He pulled back, and Dick turned around slowly.

Dick nodded and swallowed tightly. “Jason. You’re back to normal.”

“Mhm,” Jason said. “Kinda pissed about losing three weeks of my life and not remembering a damn thing, but Timmy kinda filled me in. Heard I was turned into a little three-inch… tentacle? And I could only talk to you?”

Dick quirked a nostalgic smile. “Yeah. You were cute.”

Jason scoffed. “Please, I’m not cute. But you care to fill me in on anything important? Why could I only talk to you?”

Dick shrugged. “Don’t know. Maybe it’s ‘cause you love me best,” he teased half-heartedly.

Jason did not notice. He sat down on Dick’s bed, stretching out and nuzzling the covers. “Mm, no, don’t think so. So what did we do all day? I couldn’t have been very useful as a tiny ass tentacle.”

“You mostly just talked to me while I went about my day,” Dick said, staring at where Jason was just touching and petting the covers of his bed. He sat down slowly next to Jason and immediately, Jason’s leg was pressed flushed against his. “Nothing much.”

“No? Damn, I was hoping we went and scared people or something. Nothing weird happened, right? And we’re not going to mention this… tentacle pet mess ever again right?” Jason asked warily. He sat up and stared at Dick.

“Uh… sure,” Dick said, hyper aware of Jason’s leg, Jason’s arm brushing against his, and the close proximity of Jason’s face.

“Great,” Jason said. He got up and started towards Dick’s window. “Catch you later, Dickiebird. Have fun on patrol,” he snickered. Then, Jason was out the window and into the night.

Dick frowned after him. Did Jason do all that touching on purpose? But he did not  _sound_ like he was doing it intentionally. It was more of a… knee-jerk reaction. Jason did not realize he was doing it.

Dick’s heart leapt with renewed hope. Jason’s mind maybe have forgotten Dick, but his body certainly had not.

Dick had a chance.

And he was going to fucking take it. After all, it had been over three weeks since he had been roughly manhandled and pounded into his bed after all.

* * *

_"So why is Dick the only one who can hear Jason speak?" Bruce asked, frowning at Zatanna. Something was not adding up._

_Zatanna smiled mysteriously. "The spell is... somewhat of a prank. It is harmless, but it curses one to turn into an essentially helpless creature so that only their destined may hear their cry."_

_"Destined?" Bruce asked skeptically. "Like... soulmate?"_

_"Precisely," Zatanna said. "On Earth, there are soulmates, but there are no ways of identifying one's soulmate aside from gut feeling."_

_"So you're saying Jason and Dick are-"_

_"I did not say anything, Bruce. I just believe this 'curse' may be more of a gift for your boys," Zatanna said with a wink. "Now, may I be excused? I have tea with John in twenty minutes."_

**Author's Note:**

> I want a tiny tentacle Jay with his squeaky little voice and his demanding needs.
> 
> Anyway, I know my stories aren't the funniest, the sexiest, or the cutest, but I'm not good at fluff. I was only good at angst, but I'm not going to write angst any longer. So... mediocre fluff.
> 
> I really appreciate you reading.


End file.
